What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops