What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

Neither have I

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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