What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops