Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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Neither have I

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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