Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops