What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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