Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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NEVER

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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