Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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Why don't bats have penises? They do. I tried. Menstruation.

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gay pom...

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

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Knock Kock Who's there Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley is a fictional character in the novel To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Don't cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops