What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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