Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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Bob Saget that is all

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

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what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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What's one plus one? two.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops