Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

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What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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Whats 1+1? window!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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