Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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I'm homeless.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Yo mama's like Darfur: Everyone feels bad for her, but nobody offers any substantial assistance.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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miha kako si?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops