What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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rarw

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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