roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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A circus clown climbs to the top of a five-storey ladder and dives into a foot-deep pool of water below. His neck is broken on impact. RIP Chuckles.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops