Why does Rupert the Bear wear chequered trousers? Because that's how the creator originally drew him.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops