How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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