Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops