Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

Robin, get in the car, please.

Whats fat and gay joe diragi

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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