Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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sky silverstein

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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