What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...