What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Justin with a hat.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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#IHateHashtags

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops