Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

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What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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