How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

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what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other muffin says nothing because it is a muffin.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops