Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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Knock, Knock Come in

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Why did h little boy drop his ice cream? Jerry Sandusky was behind him.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops