What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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