What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

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The Labour Party.

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A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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What is sticky and smelly - a stick

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Women's rights.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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A storm be brewin!

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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A blonde boards a plane and sits in first class. Another passenger sees the blonde in his seat and tells her she's in the wrong seat. "I'm not moving!" says the blonde. The passenger calls over the flight attendant. "Ma'am, you're supposed to be seated in economy class," says the flight attendant. "Please come with me." "No! I'm not moving!" The flight attendant informs the pilot. The pilot comes out, whispers in the blonde's ear, and then the two have wild sex, right in the open. Oh my God, you should have been there. She had the most incredible rack ever!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops