hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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alert("Hello");

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24

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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drugs.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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