What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

thumb_up thumb_down -24

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How many ADD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're people to you know...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

like this or you will die at some point in your life

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops