Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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