What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +7

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops