WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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