Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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there once was a chicken it was yellow

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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