the nintendo 3ds is being released this week. its the first 3d portable gaming device that doesnt require glasses, also known as a ball...

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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How to find if your overweight? Ask your friend to make a big clay volcano, out of baking soda and vinegar. While its erupting if you're too busy eatin five course dinner. FAT

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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Ol-ive

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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