Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why did Timmy start a fire? Because Timmy was a derranged phycopath

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

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What does DNA stand for? The National Association of Dislexics.

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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Two friends were hanging out. One of them asks, "what's that awful smell?" the other replies, "I AM NOT A ROBOT!"

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Replacement Referees

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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