When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Netball.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

What's the difference between a Satyr play and a Sedar meal? One is full of horned goat-men, the other is a feast that marks the beginning of Passover.

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

Oh...okay, good.

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...