A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

If life hands you lemons Take them

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

knock knock go away

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

Why did the plane crash Because Joe diragi is so fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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