q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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