Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

Hair

I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

62

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

Ben is gay

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

What's funny? Women's rights.

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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