What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

What's red and silly? A blood clot

Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

to see a bad joke look above

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...