What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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dildo

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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ASSCHEEKS

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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I like jokes.

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There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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