What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

thumb_up thumb_down +14

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +14

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops