Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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That awkward moment when Amish mingle has a member

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

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A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops