What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

What's long and black The unemployment line

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

Knock Knock.

Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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