Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

Thats what she said

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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