A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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Why does fowlerville suck cause everyone wishes they were black

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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