Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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I don't get it

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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How High is a Chinese man

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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Your mom is so stupoid she put a piece of paper on the TV and called it paper view!

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What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops