Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Obama = ebola

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

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So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

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yay for the idiot that posted "whats white, sticky and yummy? milk". WTF dude? milk has never been sticky and good at the same time and its never going to be. infact, ive never known milk to be sticky, maybe after such a long period of being spoiled the milk becomes somewhat sticky, but your attempt at creating a perverted joke that wasnt in anyway funny or even close to being correct was so poor i feel the need to post this and hope you read it and decide returning to school would be beneficial to the rest of your life. I guarantee everyone who reads your post about milk being sticky is thinking something pretty similar to what i am.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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