Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops