A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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