A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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If your reading this, youre not blind.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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