Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Caramel Boing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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