What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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What happens after you go to school? (you tell me, i'm only in 6th grade)

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So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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how do you win a game try your best

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops