How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

a chinese man pays the full price

Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

Baby Seal walks into a club.

A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...