How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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=3

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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Your adopted.....

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What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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