my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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what happened at the end of the korean marley and me? dinner

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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