Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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Hi.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I don't know really

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=3

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops