Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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it was all Tagart

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

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Chuck Norris.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops