How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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