What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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race-car = rac-ecar

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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hey hey apple

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A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

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What's beneath Chuck Norris's beard? A chin I presume, as that is what most humans have under their beards. Chuck Norris is a human and therefore is likely to have a chin. This is all based on the assumption that he is a human, because of the many characteristics he has shown that are humanlike.

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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