What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

so the weather's nice...

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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