What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Please don't shoot me

Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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