Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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I Love Hitler.

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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Is Carly smart? No.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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your fat

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45.

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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Knock Knock Come in.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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France never surrender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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