Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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knock,knock you suck

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops