I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

Yo mamma is SO fat, she is classified as fat.

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

Women's professional sports

your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

Okay.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

GAWS SI EKOJITNA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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