A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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i hate non minorities!

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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