mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

How does Hitler like his juice? With pulp

What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

woman's lacrosse

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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