Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

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What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops