Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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I am quite mature.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

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bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

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Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops