A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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p

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Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Chlamydia

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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What do you call a kid that hasnt passes 7th grade? A 6th grader

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antonis sister is mighty fine

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops