What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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whats wosre than stubbing your toe? being lost on a desert island being raped

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Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall: "Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!! by darragh hamilton

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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