How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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I can't see my forehead

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

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So a seal walks into a club...

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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