Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Guess what? Chicken butt

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I love you very much.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

thumb_up thumb_down +68

What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops