Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

chuck norris is a little b|tch

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

thumb_up thumb_down

What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down

A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

thumb_up thumb_down -6

potato

thumb_up thumb_down -6

if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

thumb_up thumb_down -6

balls in ya mouf

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Liars go to hell! -God

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

P0P T4Rt

thumb_up thumb_down -16

87

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops