Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

Hey how is your wife and my kids

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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