Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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Your girlfriend.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops