Knock knock. Its open.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

a. why? b. because I wanted

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

My Nan, that is all.

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

kkkk

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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