Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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