What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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I can't see my forehead

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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