You are the third derivative of the position function.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

Jess Burns

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

Scott

RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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