Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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