I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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A blonde boards a plane and sits in first class. Another passenger sees the blonde in his seat and tells her she's in the wrong seat. "I'm not moving!" says the blonde. The passenger calls over the flight attendant. "Ma'am, you're supposed to be seated in economy class," says the flight attendant. "Please come with me." "No! I'm not moving!" The flight attendant informs the pilot. The pilot comes out, whispers in the blonde's ear, and then the two have wild sex, right in the open. Oh my God, you should have been there. She had the most incredible rack ever!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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