What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

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What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

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What did the Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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