What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

thumb_up thumb_down +15

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

GOODBYE

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats a movie? A moving picture.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops