- Anti Joke

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

what's worse than 24? 6 million.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.