What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

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What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

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Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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