Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Two friends were hanging out. One of them asks, "what's that awful smell?" the other replies, "I AM NOT A ROBOT!"

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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