Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

what did jacob say to coach a joke

Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

What do you call a black guy with a white guy name? Bradley

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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