An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

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yay for the idiot that posted "whats white, sticky and yummy? milk". WTF dude? milk has never been sticky and good at the same time and its never going to be. infact, ive never known milk to be sticky, maybe after such a long period of being spoiled the milk becomes somewhat sticky, but your attempt at creating a perverted joke that wasnt in anyway funny or even close to being correct was so poor i feel the need to post this and hope you read it and decide returning to school would be beneficial to the rest of your life. I guarantee everyone who reads your post about milk being sticky is thinking something pretty similar to what i am.

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What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

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Q) What do you call a black man swinging from a tree? A) A very silly man as it is potentially dangerous

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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