Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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