whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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