What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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