Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Pain Olympics.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops