What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops