A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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who is not good looking? mon morello

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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