So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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