what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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