Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Things to do get an A on my test win my hockey game become immortal well that escalated quickly

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

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Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

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Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

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A rapist walks into a bar. He is promptly arrested afterwards.

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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call me maybe.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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