Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

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a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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RUN

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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One day a man named Tyler put a picture of an Asian in his wallet and proceeded to call himself Asian even though he was of Caucasian. Then a theif pick pocketed his wallet and was confused.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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