How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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What did the man say to his wife. Hi

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

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-Why was six afraid of seven? -Because seven's a rapist

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

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Wanna hear a joke? Women Voteing. -Austin Conradt

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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