Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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