Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

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How to trick hundreds or religious people to drink cyanide? You establish a religious community in which you establish a ritual of drinking Kool-Aid once a day and one day switch the Kool-Aid with cyanide.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops