Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

American: Hi im American Hispanic: Oh hey

What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

John Travolta went to a seafood disco last week.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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