Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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A pope meets another one

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

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And you honored it I see :P

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What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

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So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

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Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

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Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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