Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Get up Look in the mirror

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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hey guys im gay

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops