What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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