Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

What's white and horny? A unicorn

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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