I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

why did katy fall off her bike?

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

the NAACP

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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