What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Why did h little boy drop his ice cream? Jerry Sandusky was behind him.

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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24

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops