How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Women's Rights

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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woman's rights

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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