Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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Women's Rights

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why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

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the cow goes moo

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Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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