I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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I wrote a funny joke.

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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