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A seal walks into a club.

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What's red and smells like green paint? Red Paint

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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whos a sick fuck? jake morris

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops