Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Niall Horan

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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How scoops of ice cream does a n*gger get? 0.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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