I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

Horse.

Hey how is your wife and my kids

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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