Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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