What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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Ring Ring Hello? Click

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roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops