What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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