What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

A baby seal walks into a club.

What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

Q: Why is Rosie odonell fat? A: Because you are sexual attracted to small children.

Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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