How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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