Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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kk

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops