What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

The New York Giants

i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

A woman walks into a bar.

A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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