Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

Where does Hemech take a shit? The toilet's ass

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

What mother loved her son so much, she gave him a scar on his forehead for it? Lily Potter.

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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