Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A Mormon walks into a bar

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Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Jack Stevens

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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