Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Whats more fun than swinging a baby around on a clothesline at 200 miles per hour ? Stopping it with a shovel

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

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Whats fat and gay joe diragi

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops