Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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