A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Girl fight: Teachers take them to dq Boy fight: Lunch and recess in the library.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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