What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

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I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

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What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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