Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

What is the worst joke ever? This one.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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