why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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