how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

A Christian walks into a bar . . . mitzvah.

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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