The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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