How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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a black man walks into a shop for an interview....everyone gets afraid and hides behind there desk..when the black man wonders why they are scarred he says "I'm here for the interview"...they all tell him to leave because on his resume he put his name as john...they thought he was white....

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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